10 prayers for adoption from The Gospel Coalition.... see the link...see if God will use you as part of the answer to this prayer.
http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2010/01/13/10-prayers-for-the-sake-of-orphans-in-2010/
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Where oh, where are you?
DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITED I AM? (I think I did actually squeal out loud....)
But, now I'm just dumbfounded? I mean, who really is interested in my silly ramblings and boring paperwork updates?
Anyhow, I am DYING to meet you all. I have been reading all the comments of other people's blogs and clicking any person's links that I can in order to find other families that are adopting or have adopted (most particularly from Mexico). Ok, it really is bordering on stalking, but all for a good cause!
So, please, leave me a comment. Say hello! Tell me if you are adopting (from Mexico or some other place), have already adopted, or you are just a person strangely interested in ramblings about paperwork. And tell me as much info about yourself as you feel comfortable. I'm like a sponge soaking up any morsel of information (ok, I like to mix metaphors!).
*****************
Here's the latest on the paperwork front....
Psychological report is done. A medical doctor has confirmed that we are not lunatics or psychotic. All my friends and family may beg to differ, but it's right there in print. Even notarized for officiality. SO, HA!
After a month of phone calls and emails, and finally a slightly nasty phone call to a certain person's boss, I finally have the necessary letter from our insurance company stating our adopted children will have health coverage. I HATE that the only way to get some people to follow through with things is to get nasty. Customer service really stinks sometimes. But, once I went to the bosses, I had my letter notarized and in the mail in 2 hours.... sigh.
The homestudy is in the process of being written as we speak. Hopefully. She said it'd be done in a week and a half, but so far I've not gotten any indication of how things are progressing. I'm praying that it will be done this week!
THEN, once we have that completed and notarized, we can send in our I-800A to immigration. This is the paperwork petitioning the US government to allow us to adopt internationally. I haven't heard any recent news on how long the USCIS is taking to approve people but our social worker said 2 months. During that time, we'll be assembling our dossier- the stack of paperwork that requires lots of pretty gold stickers to certify that they are authentic, that then gets sent to the Mexican Government.
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Comic Relief...
So today has to rate as one of the funniest in the adoption process so far. I had been under the impression that we needed to have our Psychological Evaluation as part of our dossier. We aren't quite at that point yet, so, though I had a psychologist, I hadn't set up an appointment yet. Then, during our last homestudy visit, our social worker mentioned that she needed to have our psych results as part of our homestudy. So I was scrambling to get an appointment.
We needed to have an MMPI- which stands for something I'm sure- but basically it is just a personality test. Often people have to take them as part of a job hiring process. And then, the psychologist has to write a 2-3 page report on each of us to include with our paperwork.
The psychologist was a jolly old man who wasn't really interested in interviewing us at all! He started off by telling us that he wants us to write up all our personal history and he'll include all that into the report. Ugh. A writing assignment. Then we had to take the MMPI- all 550plus questions of it.
He took us to a separate room for some privacy. Let me just tell you, we got a little slap happy during some of the questions. Here are a few we remember....we had to answer true or false.
I like to read Mechanic magazines
I often hear sounds that no one else can hear.
I am afraid of doorknobs.
When I close my eyes I hear people talking to me when no one else is around.
If I was an artist I would like to paint children.
I am sure someone is trying to rob me.
Sometimes my voice changes to a different sound even when I am not sick.
I would like to write editorials about the theater.
I sometimes feel like I want to smash things.
I frequently see things that others can't see.
If someone makes me angry I try to hurt them back.
I would like to be a soldier.
People can talk to me when they are not with me.
Now, I'm sure all of the questions put together do a great job of determining psychological problems, but to us, we were just cracking up at a few of the questions that just seemed bizarre. And what's the deal with SO many of them asking about hearing voices??
There were soo many more and were even funnier, but well, ......ok, maybe you just had to be there...(this isn't sounding as funny as when we were taking the test.) Maybe we really aren't mentally stable! LOL!
Sunday, January 3, 2010
A Roller Coaster Drop...
Last week we got some pretty bittersweet news. The three children that we'd been pursuing, and had fallen in love with since June, are no longer available for adoption. We can't adopt them. That's the bitter part- for us. The sweet part, though, is that the reason they are not available is that they are being adopted by a Mexican family! It is wonderful for them. They will get a family that will allow them to stay in their culture and potentially get a family faster than if we were adopting them.
It is disappointing for us because we had already pictured them as part of our family. The kids are so sad, but they are handling it well. It seemed so perfect with the ages and genders, but it was not meant to be. Though we loved them from afar and prayed for them, they were never meant to be ours. I am thankful for the few months that we were connected to them even though they never knew us.
Brent and I both feel peace about it, but it does take some of the excitement out of the process. It makes the waiting easier when there are sweet little faces that you can keep looking at on your computer screen with names and personalities that you know. Now, we will have to proceed though the next few (or many) months with the trust that God already has our children picked out for us- we just don't know what they look like yet.
It does open up the doors for asking questions such as... Do we still want three? How many boys? How many girls? What health situations will we be willing to take? Frankly, we just don't know the answer to these right now. We are still in the process of praying and waiting on God to reveal His desires to us. This is a whole new aspect to the adoption process that we didn't think we would have to consider since we found these particular children so early on in our search. Some of those questions are really hard to answer and still be completely open and trusting of God- especially the health issues.
On the upswing of the roller coaster ride....
We had the first interview for our homestudy on New Year's Eve. The social worker couldn't be more sweet! She immediately put us at ease and had the kids laughing and joking in the first few minutes. We have to meet three more times- hopefully over the next week and a half. She hopes to have the report done by the end of January which will be wonderful!
We're still waiting on the bunk bed decision, which will ultimately determine how many children and whether they are boys or girls we can be approved for. So that is actually a blessing since it will help us make our decisions for us! LOL!
So, for now we just continue on the process- surrendering our expectations and desires to Him who is Sovereign and Good. He has chosen our family before the foundation of the world and will bring us together at just the right time and with just the right people. May I continually rejoice in His plan and thank Him for each twist and turn of the journey.
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
We have a date!
Yay! I talked to the homestudy social worker, finally, and we've set up a date for our interview! I'm so excited to actually have it on the calendar! (She'd sent me the dates last week but I never received them because her computer got a virus and ate her emails. Grrrr...)
She's going to try to combine the four appointments into 2 by having extra long meetings. So we're getting together on New Years Eve and then again on January 7th. She seems super sweet and laid back, so I feel like it will go well. And, she said she wants to have it completely done before she goes out of town the third week of January. So that works in our favor!
As soon as our homestudy has been revised and finalized by both agencies, we can immediately send it off with our I-800A imigration form. This is when the US government approves that we can adopt. It takes about 2-3 months to hear back- so the faster we can submit the I-800A, and get it back, the faster we can send our dossier to Mexico! Can you tell I'm chomping at the bit to get through this paperwork stage? LOL!
I do love all the paperwork, though. It makes me feel like I am DOING something. I have a feeling I am NOT going to like the time period after all the paperwork is submitted and we are just sitting around twiddling our thumbs waiting to hear something. But, I know God has lessons to teach me in that stage, too. Patience. Lots of Patience. I'm learning that the adoption process is very sanctifying....
Unfortunately, we still don't have any answers from the licensing department about the use of bunk beds. In order to fit everyone, we have to use a set of bunk beds and the health inspector said he didn't think they were allowed. If we can't, then we're going to have to build a bedroom (and, of course, a bathroom) in the basement for Brent and I.
We had been planning on doing this in the future (I think we're going to need some space for US with 7 kids in the house...), but we were hoping we didn't have to before the adoption. Too Expensive! There is nothing in Maryland law about the use of bunk beds, but the social worker thinks that it might be a licensing regulation.
So we're still waiting. She did say that the construction wouldn't have to be finished before the homestudy is complete, thank goodness! That would have slowed us down drastically!
Here's a little sweetness that God sent our way....
We have to submit a bunch of photographs of each room of our house and the outside for our dossier. I wasn't too thrilled to send a photo of the outside of our house because our landscaping stinks. Our grass is weed filled and very un-lush. We definitely need to do some work on the front gardens, but let's just say "it ain't even in the top 10 of the priority list".
I had jokingly said we needed some snow to make our cute, little red rancher look better and hide the ugly garden. Well, we got it- didn't we! A whole lot of snow! That massive amount of snow hid a multitude of sins in our landscaping. Sooo, now Mexico will think we have an adorable little house AND think the bushes under that snow are just as cute! Brent got a bunch of good photos!
Here are some of the things I'm doing over the next few weeks...
-a notorized letter from our health insurance company saying that the adopted children will be under our insurance- was expected to be here a week ago and still hasn't come....hmmm....
-finalizing a date with the psychologist to do our evaluation
-go to State Archives in Annapolis to find a copy of a document that I need another copy of
-start our 10 hours of adoption classes required under the HAGUE convention- thankfully, they are online! We plan on starting them while Brent is recovering from sinus surgery on the 28th! He won't be able to do much else, so perfect timing!
-find out how many post placement visits state in Mexico requires so we can prepay for them according to HAGUE regulations
-have a conference call with socialworker on the specifics of our dossier paperwork! I love this! I'm giddy just thinking about doing this part! I should have been a secretary!
She's going to try to combine the four appointments into 2 by having extra long meetings. So we're getting together on New Years Eve and then again on January 7th. She seems super sweet and laid back, so I feel like it will go well. And, she said she wants to have it completely done before she goes out of town the third week of January. So that works in our favor!
As soon as our homestudy has been revised and finalized by both agencies, we can immediately send it off with our I-800A imigration form. This is when the US government approves that we can adopt. It takes about 2-3 months to hear back- so the faster we can submit the I-800A, and get it back, the faster we can send our dossier to Mexico! Can you tell I'm chomping at the bit to get through this paperwork stage? LOL!
I do love all the paperwork, though. It makes me feel like I am DOING something. I have a feeling I am NOT going to like the time period after all the paperwork is submitted and we are just sitting around twiddling our thumbs waiting to hear something. But, I know God has lessons to teach me in that stage, too. Patience. Lots of Patience. I'm learning that the adoption process is very sanctifying....
Unfortunately, we still don't have any answers from the licensing department about the use of bunk beds. In order to fit everyone, we have to use a set of bunk beds and the health inspector said he didn't think they were allowed. If we can't, then we're going to have to build a bedroom (and, of course, a bathroom) in the basement for Brent and I.
We had been planning on doing this in the future (I think we're going to need some space for US with 7 kids in the house...), but we were hoping we didn't have to before the adoption. Too Expensive! There is nothing in Maryland law about the use of bunk beds, but the social worker thinks that it might be a licensing regulation.
So we're still waiting. She did say that the construction wouldn't have to be finished before the homestudy is complete, thank goodness! That would have slowed us down drastically!
Here's a little sweetness that God sent our way....
We have to submit a bunch of photographs of each room of our house and the outside for our dossier. I wasn't too thrilled to send a photo of the outside of our house because our landscaping stinks. Our grass is weed filled and very un-lush. We definitely need to do some work on the front gardens, but let's just say "it ain't even in the top 10 of the priority list".
I had jokingly said we needed some snow to make our cute, little red rancher look better and hide the ugly garden. Well, we got it- didn't we! A whole lot of snow! That massive amount of snow hid a multitude of sins in our landscaping. Sooo, now Mexico will think we have an adorable little house AND think the bushes under that snow are just as cute! Brent got a bunch of good photos!
Here are some of the things I'm doing over the next few weeks...
-a notorized letter from our health insurance company saying that the adopted children will be under our insurance- was expected to be here a week ago and still hasn't come....hmmm....
-finalizing a date with the psychologist to do our evaluation
-go to State Archives in Annapolis to find a copy of a document that I need another copy of
-start our 10 hours of adoption classes required under the HAGUE convention- thankfully, they are online! We plan on starting them while Brent is recovering from sinus surgery on the 28th! He won't be able to do much else, so perfect timing!
-find out how many post placement visits state in Mexico requires so we can prepay for them according to HAGUE regulations
-have a conference call with socialworker on the specifics of our dossier paperwork! I love this! I'm giddy just thinking about doing this part! I should have been a secretary!
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Please read this...
My friends,
You need to read this girl's blog. At least the first few entries on this page. You. Just. Need. To.
Love,
Tiffany
You need to read this girl's blog. At least the first few entries on this page. You. Just. Need. To.
Love,
Tiffany
Update!
Health Inspection is done! Whew.
We had the guy come out and though he was nice, he was much more thorough than I thought he'd be. We got called on a few things, but thankfully he allowed us to just write a letter saying that they had been fixed. We had to fix a broken window, get a more recent water test and fix a leak that was under our bathroom sink. The leak was a shock! We've never had a leak there! In fact, it wasn't leaking there the night before because I put stuff in the vanity cabinet and all was well.
The water testing man actually came 2 minutes before the health inspector. Instead of testing the water in the basement like normal, he went back to the bathroom to do the test. The water was running for 20 minutes and I guess it was during this time that we sprung the leak! Figures! The leak started WHILE the inspector was there! Kind of comical, huh?
Anyway, all is fixed and a letter has been sent and our health report has been turned in to the homestudy agency.
Then, as if we don't have enough going on, we- ok, "I", decided that painting the living room, dining room and hallway was the next priority. We hadn't painted since we moved in 9 years ago and when we replaced our flooring 5 years ago we'd put up primed trim, but had never painted it. So, as you can imagine, with four kids, it was dirty and messy beyond belief. Since it was primed and never painted, I can't even get the fingerprints off with heavy duty cleaners!
Brent had to work, but my wonderfully awesome Dad and brother came over to paint with me/for me! Mom and the girls came a few days too and were great helps- especially when it came to the finishing touches and getting the room back together! Thank you, Lord for parents with servant hearts! Dad had to work nights, but he graciously came during the day to help me. He had to be exhausted! Thank you, Dad! And, Jordan, you are the best brother a girl can have! Mom and Sammi and Abbie- my house looks so pretty now! Just how I've always imagined it, but could never pull off by myself! Ab- you should be a designer, seriously!
So this week we've just been waiting around to hear from our homestudy agency on a date for interviews. And getting back to some normal school schedule after 2 weeks of chaos. And getting our Christmas tree. And shopping for presents. Whew. Seems like nothing after the past few weeks, though!
We had the guy come out and though he was nice, he was much more thorough than I thought he'd be. We got called on a few things, but thankfully he allowed us to just write a letter saying that they had been fixed. We had to fix a broken window, get a more recent water test and fix a leak that was under our bathroom sink. The leak was a shock! We've never had a leak there! In fact, it wasn't leaking there the night before because I put stuff in the vanity cabinet and all was well.
The water testing man actually came 2 minutes before the health inspector. Instead of testing the water in the basement like normal, he went back to the bathroom to do the test. The water was running for 20 minutes and I guess it was during this time that we sprung the leak! Figures! The leak started WHILE the inspector was there! Kind of comical, huh?
Anyway, all is fixed and a letter has been sent and our health report has been turned in to the homestudy agency.
Then, as if we don't have enough going on, we- ok, "I", decided that painting the living room, dining room and hallway was the next priority. We hadn't painted since we moved in 9 years ago and when we replaced our flooring 5 years ago we'd put up primed trim, but had never painted it. So, as you can imagine, with four kids, it was dirty and messy beyond belief. Since it was primed and never painted, I can't even get the fingerprints off with heavy duty cleaners!
Brent had to work, but my wonderfully awesome Dad and brother came over to paint with me/for me! Mom and the girls came a few days too and were great helps- especially when it came to the finishing touches and getting the room back together! Thank you, Lord for parents with servant hearts! Dad had to work nights, but he graciously came during the day to help me. He had to be exhausted! Thank you, Dad! And, Jordan, you are the best brother a girl can have! Mom and Sammi and Abbie- my house looks so pretty now! Just how I've always imagined it, but could never pull off by myself! Ab- you should be a designer, seriously!
So this week we've just been waiting around to hear from our homestudy agency on a date for interviews. And getting back to some normal school schedule after 2 weeks of chaos. And getting our Christmas tree. And shopping for presents. Whew. Seems like nothing after the past few weeks, though!
Thursday, December 3, 2009
I'm Pooped!
I am so exhausted! It's a good exhaustion, though. Wanna know why? Ok, since you asked, I'll tell you! LOL!
Last Monday, I was emailing a few questions to our homestudy lady and I casually asked if she'd turned in our health department form and how long would it take for them to call for the appointment. Boy am I glad I asked! Apparantly I misunderstood who was supposed to get the Health Inspection Request form! I sent it to my agency instead of straight to the Health Dept.! I was so bummed! I turned that paper in a few weeks ago and now I was going to be behind! (You see I have had it in my head to get this homestudy done by Christmas. I know it is probably unrealistic, but I can hope, can't I?)
Now I had to re-do the form, send it in and wait 2-3 MORE weeks before they even call for an appointment! Count out the "by Christmas" plan!
Ok, can you see where this is going? Already, after such a GOD MOMENT last week, I was already starting to assume control over this whole situation. I wanted MY timeline. My Plan! Sheesh. The nerve I have, right?
Unfortunately, I didn't clue in to this myself. My loving hubby pointed it out gently. Thankfully, God is quick to forgive and give peace! God gave me a calmness and peacefulness so that I could not be annoyed at my homestudy lady or anyone else that crossed my path! (Oh, I hate when I get like this! Just keepin' it honest, though.)
So, first thing Tuesday, I filled out a new form and sent it with Brent for him to HAND DELIVER to the Health Department across the street from his office.
Later that day I found an email from Brent saying that the actual Health Inspector was there and spoke to him personally! He even set up an appointment ON THE SPOT! For Monday! Can you believe it? I think this all worked out even better than if it had gone right in the first place! So now, we're still on track for finishing by Christmas! I know I don't deserve that, after my snotty controling attitude, but God is so gracious!
And, just because He can, He had the Fire Inspector call and set up his appointment for tomorrow! Whew!
So, the reason that I'm pooped is because we've been working our backsides to the bone getting the house TOTALLY clean and fixed up! Let me just tell you, I've found places to clean in this house that I didn't even know existed!
Brent has been going strong fixing screening in a few windows, installing more smoke detectors in EACH room, taking lots of junk to the dumpster, sorting through every various chemical in our house since certain things aren't allowed in certain rooms, baby proofing (which is so funny because we've never baby-proofed the house, we house-proofed the babies), rearranging our storage room so nothing is stored within 30 inches of any combustion-producing appliance (believe me, I've measured!), putting up a sign that has our house number on it, and vacuuming any evidence of furry friends that make their home in our basement in the winter (just part of living in the country!).
The kids have worked very hard, too. In fact they earned quite a decent paycheck for some of their chores. I think I will find myself broke!
After all this cleaning and fixing, it does feel nice knowing it is done. In fact, I told Brent that maybe we should schedule a Health Inspection every year, adoption or no adoption- just for the pressure to keep it clean! He didn't find that funny. I think I heard him muttering something about getting a divorce....LOL!
SOOOO, we are on the final stretch of our paperwork for our homestudy! I can finally turn in the last bit of paperwork! Next is on to interviews!
Last Monday, I was emailing a few questions to our homestudy lady and I casually asked if she'd turned in our health department form and how long would it take for them to call for the appointment. Boy am I glad I asked! Apparantly I misunderstood who was supposed to get the Health Inspection Request form! I sent it to my agency instead of straight to the Health Dept.! I was so bummed! I turned that paper in a few weeks ago and now I was going to be behind! (You see I have had it in my head to get this homestudy done by Christmas. I know it is probably unrealistic, but I can hope, can't I?)
Now I had to re-do the form, send it in and wait 2-3 MORE weeks before they even call for an appointment! Count out the "by Christmas" plan!
Ok, can you see where this is going? Already, after such a GOD MOMENT last week, I was already starting to assume control over this whole situation. I wanted MY timeline. My Plan! Sheesh. The nerve I have, right?
Unfortunately, I didn't clue in to this myself. My loving hubby pointed it out gently. Thankfully, God is quick to forgive and give peace! God gave me a calmness and peacefulness so that I could not be annoyed at my homestudy lady or anyone else that crossed my path! (Oh, I hate when I get like this! Just keepin' it honest, though.)
So, first thing Tuesday, I filled out a new form and sent it with Brent for him to HAND DELIVER to the Health Department across the street from his office.
Later that day I found an email from Brent saying that the actual Health Inspector was there and spoke to him personally! He even set up an appointment ON THE SPOT! For Monday! Can you believe it? I think this all worked out even better than if it had gone right in the first place! So now, we're still on track for finishing by Christmas! I know I don't deserve that, after my snotty controling attitude, but God is so gracious!
And, just because He can, He had the Fire Inspector call and set up his appointment for tomorrow! Whew!
So, the reason that I'm pooped is because we've been working our backsides to the bone getting the house TOTALLY clean and fixed up! Let me just tell you, I've found places to clean in this house that I didn't even know existed!
Brent has been going strong fixing screening in a few windows, installing more smoke detectors in EACH room, taking lots of junk to the dumpster, sorting through every various chemical in our house since certain things aren't allowed in certain rooms, baby proofing (which is so funny because we've never baby-proofed the house, we house-proofed the babies), rearranging our storage room so nothing is stored within 30 inches of any combustion-producing appliance (believe me, I've measured!), putting up a sign that has our house number on it, and vacuuming any evidence of furry friends that make their home in our basement in the winter (just part of living in the country!).
The kids have worked very hard, too. In fact they earned quite a decent paycheck for some of their chores. I think I will find myself broke!
After all this cleaning and fixing, it does feel nice knowing it is done. In fact, I told Brent that maybe we should schedule a Health Inspection every year, adoption or no adoption- just for the pressure to keep it clean! He didn't find that funny. I think I heard him muttering something about getting a divorce....LOL!
SOOOO, we are on the final stretch of our paperwork for our homestudy! I can finally turn in the last bit of paperwork! Next is on to interviews!
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Overwhelmed- but you don't want to miss this...
I don't even know where to begin this entry. It's long and complicated, but it is God's story, so I can't wait to tell it.
Since the beginning, this adoption has been God's idea. He planted the seed in our minds. He gave peace when it didn't make sense. He provided confirmation after confirmation. He allowed us to find the children we fell in love with. He made all the pieces fall in place with the agonizing decision over which agency to go with.
So this week has really been where the rubber meets the road. We have mentally and emotionally engaged in this plan, but now reality is setting in and we needed to make some decisions on HOW we were going to financially pay for this. Most people get a home equity loan and are done with it. Well, since we don't our home, that's not an option. We found a few places that offered interest free adoption loans and grants. They look like wonderful ministries and I called and spoke to them to find out the requirements.
The thing is this: getting a loan totally alleviates the need for us to NEED God. Not that a loan is wrong- I would never, ever say that. God uses those loans in a wonderful way. BUT, this year God has been teaching Brent and I what it means to live in a radical way. We have been discovering that in the US, Christians don't NEED God to show up very often because we are self-sufficient. We have life insurance, health insurance, retirement plans, car loans, house loans, savings accounts... etc.
Not that any of that is wrong. Hear me on this! It's just that we MISS so many blessings because we don't MAKE OURSELVES DEPENDENT ON HIM! Brent and I have wrestled with this a lot this year. How do you really live a Life of faith in the US? Usually we have moments in our lives where we need God to work, but not on a daily basis. We are learning that we want to live life differently than the way we have been. I don't want to get to the end of my days and God show me all the ways He wanted to work in my life, but I didn't need Him to because I'd already had a backup plan because I didn't really think He would show up! (I know that is doctrinally incorrect, but you guys get what I'm saying, right?)
So, after much discussion, prayer and peace from the Holy Spirit, Brent and I decided that we would not take a loan out for the adoption. We would step out in faith and let God be the one to provide for every dollar. It was His idea anyway. If that means that the money trickles in slowly over months and months, so be it. This was SUPER hard for me, because I'm trying to finish all our homestudy paperwork at breakneck speed. I don't want these little Mexican Sweeties to have to spend one day longer than necessary in that orphanage. The thought of all our paperwork being completed, but it just sitting there in a file until all the funds were raised was a very real and difficult reality. But, again came that PEACE. You know- the unexplainable kind. The kind He keeps giving when it doesn't make sense. A total surrender and trust. Ah.
Well, I have to say that right now God has invaded our lives in an INCREDIBLE way. This week God showed off. He just loves it when His people stop trying to control His plan! He wants us to just watch Him work!
This week- out of the blue- someone has decided to bless us with- get this- $20,000. Yes, that's the right number of zeros.
Can I just tell you how overwhelmed I feel right now? I am overwhelmed that God loves us so much that He would do this just because He can! I'm overwhelmed because for the first time I truly put my complete faith in Him with no backup plan and we got to truly see Him work. I am overwhelmed because the people who are blessing us with this support need this money as much as we do. They have given up their future nest egg because they choose to live in obedience and faith also. I am overwhelmed that I am experiencing a little bit of what it must have been like in the early church- when "they had all things in common".
After the tears, the shock, the shaking hands, more tears- I realized that suddenly our lives became VERY clear. Life doesn't look so complicated. Not because we got a huge monetary gift, but because faith is so simple. Worry, anxiety, and fear feel like a dead enemy to me. I feel such comfort and joy in knowing that this God, who chose me and each of my days before the foundation of the world. has each moment of our lives completely under His control.
Even in the midst of such high emotions, a little sadness creeps in when I think about how, in my flesh, I will at some point fail in this simp;e faith. I will again, one day, let fear or need for control creep in. But, hopefully, I will be able to quickly recall this Huge moment of God's faithfulness and sovereignty and I will again step back into daily faith. Oh, grace, sweet grace!
So, tonight, on the evening of Thanksgiving, I must tell you all how thankful I am. Yes, for the physical money- it is a real need- but mostly for the priviledge and honor I feel, knowing that I belong to One who does not struggle with moving mountains. I am His child and I am so glad He invited me into His journey.
Since the beginning, this adoption has been God's idea. He planted the seed in our minds. He gave peace when it didn't make sense. He provided confirmation after confirmation. He allowed us to find the children we fell in love with. He made all the pieces fall in place with the agonizing decision over which agency to go with.
So this week has really been where the rubber meets the road. We have mentally and emotionally engaged in this plan, but now reality is setting in and we needed to make some decisions on HOW we were going to financially pay for this. Most people get a home equity loan and are done with it. Well, since we don't our home, that's not an option. We found a few places that offered interest free adoption loans and grants. They look like wonderful ministries and I called and spoke to them to find out the requirements.
The thing is this: getting a loan totally alleviates the need for us to NEED God. Not that a loan is wrong- I would never, ever say that. God uses those loans in a wonderful way. BUT, this year God has been teaching Brent and I what it means to live in a radical way. We have been discovering that in the US, Christians don't NEED God to show up very often because we are self-sufficient. We have life insurance, health insurance, retirement plans, car loans, house loans, savings accounts... etc.
Not that any of that is wrong. Hear me on this! It's just that we MISS so many blessings because we don't MAKE OURSELVES DEPENDENT ON HIM! Brent and I have wrestled with this a lot this year. How do you really live a Life of faith in the US? Usually we have moments in our lives where we need God to work, but not on a daily basis. We are learning that we want to live life differently than the way we have been. I don't want to get to the end of my days and God show me all the ways He wanted to work in my life, but I didn't need Him to because I'd already had a backup plan because I didn't really think He would show up! (I know that is doctrinally incorrect, but you guys get what I'm saying, right?)
So, after much discussion, prayer and peace from the Holy Spirit, Brent and I decided that we would not take a loan out for the adoption. We would step out in faith and let God be the one to provide for every dollar. It was His idea anyway. If that means that the money trickles in slowly over months and months, so be it. This was SUPER hard for me, because I'm trying to finish all our homestudy paperwork at breakneck speed. I don't want these little Mexican Sweeties to have to spend one day longer than necessary in that orphanage. The thought of all our paperwork being completed, but it just sitting there in a file until all the funds were raised was a very real and difficult reality. But, again came that PEACE. You know- the unexplainable kind. The kind He keeps giving when it doesn't make sense. A total surrender and trust. Ah.
Well, I have to say that right now God has invaded our lives in an INCREDIBLE way. This week God showed off. He just loves it when His people stop trying to control His plan! He wants us to just watch Him work!
This week- out of the blue- someone has decided to bless us with- get this- $20,000. Yes, that's the right number of zeros.
Can I just tell you how overwhelmed I feel right now? I am overwhelmed that God loves us so much that He would do this just because He can! I'm overwhelmed because for the first time I truly put my complete faith in Him with no backup plan and we got to truly see Him work. I am overwhelmed because the people who are blessing us with this support need this money as much as we do. They have given up their future nest egg because they choose to live in obedience and faith also. I am overwhelmed that I am experiencing a little bit of what it must have been like in the early church- when "they had all things in common".
After the tears, the shock, the shaking hands, more tears- I realized that suddenly our lives became VERY clear. Life doesn't look so complicated. Not because we got a huge monetary gift, but because faith is so simple. Worry, anxiety, and fear feel like a dead enemy to me. I feel such comfort and joy in knowing that this God, who chose me and each of my days before the foundation of the world. has each moment of our lives completely under His control.
Even in the midst of such high emotions, a little sadness creeps in when I think about how, in my flesh, I will at some point fail in this simp;e faith. I will again, one day, let fear or need for control creep in. But, hopefully, I will be able to quickly recall this Huge moment of God's faithfulness and sovereignty and I will again step back into daily faith. Oh, grace, sweet grace!
So, tonight, on the evening of Thanksgiving, I must tell you all how thankful I am. Yes, for the physical money- it is a real need- but mostly for the priviledge and honor I feel, knowing that I belong to One who does not struggle with moving mountains. I am His child and I am so glad He invited me into His journey.
Monday, November 23, 2009
One more thing on the homestudy checklist completed!
Today Brent and I dropped off the Request for Fire Inspection at the Fire Marshall's office in Bel Air. I had put it in an envelope and even put it into the mailbox last Friday, but decided early Saturday morning to pull it back out and deliver it in person today while the kids were at their piano lesson. I don't know why, but I just preferred to make sure it made it to the office in person. Also, Brent knew the Fire Marshal from when he was a firefighter in Hereford years ago, so we were kind of hoping to get a personal connection there! LOL!
We did see the guy he knew and he sat and talked to us for a while. Hopefully next week we'll get a phone call and can set up an appointment for the inspection- possibly even for that day! Yay- kind of. Uh, now the pressure is on Brent to get a few projects completed on the "honey-do" list. Run a new electric line for the freezer since the circuit blew, clean out the workroom area that is a disaster since we did a kitchen facelift, mulch the gardens, cut down the new closet door so it fits correctly, put new bifold doors on the closets in the bedroom, etc, etc, etc.
I, on the other hand, need to do some major decluttering of the school room. I was so pre-occupied with the trip to Mexico that I never fully organized the school room this summer and so not everything has its own "place". It has quickly deteriorated into a room of piles that need filing or tossing. So this is my job over the next week or two.
We did see the guy he knew and he sat and talked to us for a while. Hopefully next week we'll get a phone call and can set up an appointment for the inspection- possibly even for that day! Yay- kind of. Uh, now the pressure is on Brent to get a few projects completed on the "honey-do" list. Run a new electric line for the freezer since the circuit blew, clean out the workroom area that is a disaster since we did a kitchen facelift, mulch the gardens, cut down the new closet door so it fits correctly, put new bifold doors on the closets in the bedroom, etc, etc, etc.
I, on the other hand, need to do some major decluttering of the school room. I was so pre-occupied with the trip to Mexico that I never fully organized the school room this summer and so not everything has its own "place". It has quickly deteriorated into a room of piles that need filing or tossing. So this is my job over the next week or two.
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